Don

Don

i sometimes write, getting the technical bits to be in such a way that i am proud of them and when i do that, i lose sight of how the content of the writing will be received.

i have to remember that i did not write the first poems that became bien with the purpose of having them published, it was because you took the time to read them, consider them, and suggest a book was possible that anything became of them at all.

i have been sending you unsolicited writing over the time since then, almost universally to your rejection, and it did not occur to me the difference in where in my heart the words were coming from led to any distinction.

one i sent you in the last year, written when i was at a train station, delivered to the train rider who inspired it, has led to a friendship between her and my best friend since childhood.

there was one written to my host in costa rica, who felt writing a haiku was difficult.

the most recent one, in honor of Britney, is the last of about five wholly distinct writing efforts to express what she means to me. i am in las vegas now where i met her and it's dawning on me that someone who had such an outsize influence on me is also someone who i have not thanked.

in all cases, sending the writing to you has been inappropriate. all of those other people were the audiences and the writing was deeply personal. i was sending you work before considering whether it was the best fit for black harbor. and i exercised bad judgment.

there are a number of comments you made in your email.

i believe you did something generous when you donated to codesyracuse. your donation has led to meetups that have resulted in work for struggling citizens of Syracuse. there is no need for you to continue donating.

there is no need for you to consider that last document i sent you for publishing either, if i can gather the courage to deliver it to Britney in person i will.

finally there no reason for concern about the future of working together, i see the error in what i have done. i will never send you any writing again.

i fear i made a grave error in my attempt show thanks for Britney's presence in my life while you, who put forward practical, tangible and real efforts, time, money, without my single comment either privately or publicly has now decided to end business with me.

thank you. thank you Don. thank you.

you are my hero.

Peter